When last we left our noble adventurers…
Wait, what? Okay, I’m pretty sure there were, like, seven of them the last I checked. Keep going? Got it.
All kidding aside, the campaign’s most lethal enemy thusfar has been our collective schedule. Having been thrust into the night, hacking and screaming at the zombie hordes, our group had found themselves at the doorway of a large building. As we resumed, our remaining party members (Amos, Glennindan, Killface, and
Sweet Potato Yamaraja) found themselves onset by difficulty on all sides:
- The zombies, who were certainly crippled by the loss of their biggest, life-leeching teammates, but nonetheless were after our juicy, juicy throats.
- The halflings, who had captured several undead and led them to spinning a large wheel, constantly taunted by a hanging pile of adventurer meat. Also, they hired a fucking giant.
- Some fuck-off beam of white light, which beamed down, teleporting Botto and Fenthur away. Who knows where they went, but they’re probably fine, guys. Certainly not getting blasted.
And so, spirited on by Yamaraja’s intense objection to the presence/exploitation of the undead, and by Amos’ player going, “ooh, there’s a lot of things to kill on this map”, the remaining party set off on their bloody, bloody work. Yamaraja and Killface guarded the door, holding off any would-be entrant (Yamaraja no-hit counter is at 5 days of adventuring and counting, guys). Amos chased a halfling around the barn, unable to land a killing blow. And Glennindan…
Guys, lets’ talk about Glennindan.
See, Glennindan had a distinction that nobody else in the group had (aside from a real, natural knack for cutting down halflings with axes) – he spoke Giant. And while Amos, ostensibly our group’s mouthpiece, was busy trying to chase down his first target, Glennindan and the giant had a nice chat, wherein it was discussed that the Giant was looking for more employment.
Once Amos had finally chased down his prey (just as the halfling was about to ring a bell to alert the town guard), he attempted to negotiate terms with the Giant. Oh, and Amos doesn’t speak Giant, so instead he opted to speak REALLY. LOUD. AND REALLY. SLOW. WITH LOTS. OF. HAND MOTIONS. Glennindan helped Amos come to terms with the giant, and it helped crush the remaining halflings.
Now with a giant hired for the paltry rate of 50 gold/week coming from Amos’ pockets (“Well, I’ll either die without protection, or die because I can’t afford to pay the giant, guys”), the gang set their next plot in motion – the group busted a hole through the back of the barn, with the plan of luring the zombies in through the door and then setting the whole thing on fire whilst they were inside. The plan worked perfectly; we all escaped without even a bit of damage, and the building burned down. Then, the building next to it burned down. Then, the buildings next to them, and before you knew it, the entire town was burning, cooking most townspeople and zombies along with it.
While the group stood on the edge of the massive inferno, a wizened old halfling in a large cloak spoke to them – he’d tried to convince them not to use the white stones. He didn’t offer much else, perhaps seeking to clear his own conscience in the face of the consequences for his failure.
When the smoke cleared, the remaining halflings, including the Master Brewer and the Mistress of Calendars, had rallied to figure out the next step. Though the halflings (especially the mayor) were willing to rebuild the town, Amos (and his +9 persuasion check) convinced the group that it would be better to work as indentured servants at the party’s inn. Only the mayor refused to leave; Yamaraja stayed behind to talk to her, discovering that a mysterious figure only known as “Shadow Hand” convinced them that using the white stones was a great idea. Yamaraja spared her, leaving her in the wreckage of her town, and the group returned to Decent Harbor.
We received payment for completing the mission (per our agreement), though rather than turn in the Master Brewer to Sten Proudfoot, we are holding onto him and his people to brew beer for us.